Elite Beat Agents

Oh, those wacky Japanese.

Now while I'll never claim to be an authority on the utter madness of Japanese culture, I like to think I've seen a pretty large section of their videogame weirdness. Katamari Damacy, Incredible Crisis, Live-a-Live, etc. I thought there wasn't much more they could do that would really surprise me.

I really should have known better.

The setup of Elite Beat Agents is one of those things you can only shake your head at and go "What. The. Hell." You play a team of secret agents sent out to inspire people to perform tough tasks by your sweet cheerleading moves. It's basically a rhythm game for the DS where you have to use the stylus in various ways on the screen in time with the beat. You do well, the Elite Beat Agents don't mess up, and your target succeeds. The success/failure plays out on the top screen in a series of hilarious mangaesque cutscenes - my personal favorite is Leonardo da Vinci (drawn as a shojo prettyboy) romancing the Mona Lisa by building an ornithopter.

The original Japanese game was called Osu! Tatakae! Ouendan and it featured an all J-pop soundtrack. Nintendo wisely decided to not release that in the US (not that I dislike J-pop, but there's no way it would have sold) but instead remade the game with new scenarios and Western songs, ranging from "Highway Star" to "Y.M.C.A" to "Material Girl". The songs themselves sound fine - they're not up to Guitar Hero standards in terms of covers, but that's a really high bar to hit.

Like most rhythm games, it's tricky to get the hang of the timing at first, but after a while it just comes down to getting the rhythm of the song down. The difficulty in the patterns ramps up pretty well, but there's a weird jump rIight after Y.M.C.A that had me repeating the songs a few times before I could pass.

Elite Beat Agents is one of those games that only Japan could produce - a fun, engrossing game with an utterly weird sense of humor. I eagerly look forward to seeing what other works of demented genius they'll produce next.